Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
