It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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