haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
