scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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