porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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