They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
