I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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