Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
