what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
