And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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