me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
