Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
