Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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