i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
