This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
