I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
