Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm always down for nudity.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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