if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize