Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Im part way to drunk.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
