My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
