Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
