hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
