babies were throwing up all over the place
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
