Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
