Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
