At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
