Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
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