he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
