Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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