the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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