After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
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