yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize