just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
