HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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