Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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