hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
