You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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