what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I need to stop coming to work sober
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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