She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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