Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
