I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
