I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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