i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize