HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
