Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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