wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
