come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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