How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
