She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
