So drunk its hurt
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
