even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
